Is Your Past Holding You Back?

What’ in the past should really stay there.

I get it. The way we’ve been raised, and our past experiences have shaped us into who we all are today. I can certainly say that about myself, and I’m sure if I looked at each, and every one of your pasts, I would be able to figure out why you are, who you are, today.

Unfortunately, too many people hold on to the past for too long. We create a story about who we are (whether that be a victim or a victor), and allow that to dictate what direction we take in life, for as long as the ride will roll. The truth is…

Every. Single. Person. Experiences. Challenges. In. Life.

That doesn’t mean that every person learns from the challenge, or grows from it. My job is to open the minds of those who have not yet reflected on their past experiences. I want to help those people understand what they could turn those experiences into, if they decide to learn from them. So, if you don’t know this already, it’s time for me to school ya’. Yeah, I said it. School ya’.

Believe it or not, you have a choice about who you want to be, how you want to live, and how you want to respond to any and everything. I know emotions seem involuntary a lot of the time. Reactions to extreme events like job loss, death, and similar events usually are followed by negative emotional responses. However, there are people in this world who also respond to these events differently.

Think about it...

Have you ever seen those funerals that celebrate a life, instead of mourning it? Of course, the loss is sad, but the decision to react to the loss is to be joyful about the ending of a great life, instead of focusing on how things will be without the person. A lot of people even become inspired by the loss by choosing to live their own lives differently –with more joy, with more compassion, or with more passion. For some people, the loss of a loved one, pushes them into action. They then go after a dream, or aim to call people to action. They help others appreciate the value of life…things like that.

So you see, the way you react to an event is voluntary, even if it seems really hard, at the time, to respond positively to it. There are even victims of abuse (myself included) who have initially responded in horror, but have also grown from the experience. Instead of holding onto the pain behind the experience, some have allowed it to foster nothing but good things, going forward. They may have been inspired to involve themselves in a career that helps others overcome abuse as well. They may find ways to show more compassion to other people, or to their own children, due to this experience.

Just like so, YOU ALSO, can use any event in your life, to push you towards growth. You can turn any situation around, if you choose to, no matter how painful it may have been. Letting go of the hurt is one step, but moving forward toward the person you want to be, is the best part.

Remaining stagnant in life because of what happened to you, is no excuse. I don’t care what your limitations are. If you google your problem today, I bet you can find someone that has overcome the same problem with similar limitations. They did so, because they CHOSE to move forward. They CHOSE to move past what has happened, and embrace what is ahead with knowledge, joy, and peace.

With that, I want you to think about anything you may be holding onto from your past. Is there anything that may be holding you back from the life you want to live? Is there anything keeping you from being the person you wish to be? If so, let it go. You have the choice to, I promise.

If you are having trouble letting go, consult help. It is okay if you can’t figure it out on your own. As long as you are willing to, you can get help. You can book a life session with me, or look in your local area for places that may fit your needs. Other possible options are: a pastor, a therapist, a counselor, a hotline, a support group, or a trusted friend. Letting go can be difficult, and can require time and patience. However, it is possible.

Do what it takes to make the difference in your life! It's worth it!

With courage and hope,

Chan, your LIFE COACH at [BOG].

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